Thursday, September 11, 2008

Proof that the internet is full of crap!

Tonight I had dinner and drinks with some girlfriends. These are girlfriends that have known me my entire life. We find when we get together, no topic is off limit. Because I generally am interested in CRAP, we were discussing our recent BMs and how mine of late have been green. Not Kermit green, more of a military green, in case you were wondering. My sister, in her infinite wisdom, told me to look on the internet in order to figure out what was going on. Here is one of the more interesting sites that I found:

green poop and stomachaches
Posted 02.18.2004 by Poonurse (1313)

Michelle asks:
My five year old has had bright green bowel movements for about a week now and has also complained about stomach aches quite a bit. What do you think?

Hi, and thanks for the question!
Maybe it's just me, but I would take her to a doctor. There is no way to know over the internet what is wrong with her, and especially no way for a site such as PoopReport, which deals comically with poop issues, to give you any other advice.

Hope she is ok! Look carefully at what she has been eating over the past few weeks.
Please be advised that I am only a Poonurse. I am NOT a medical doctor. Any advice I give should be taken moderate skepticism. Please consult a REAL medical doctor if you feel you have a serious medical condition.

-- Poonurse

Poonurse is an RN with 25 years experience in labor and delivery. Her qualifications include seeing a lot of poop, and owning a computer. Also, she works in Michigan, which she calls the asshole of the universe, so that's another bit of credibility. Got a question for her?

Holy Shit! I've missed my calling. I had no idea that a Poonurse was even a career option. I have to agree with her advice, mainly because she admits that Michicagan is the asshole of the universe. Go Bucks!!!!!