Sunday, March 2, 2008

Public service announcement and a brief apology

I am begging you...listen very carefully. I am not responsible for what happens to you if you do not take this advice very carefully. DO NOT GO AND SEE VANTAGE POINT. I REPEAT, DO NOT GO AND SEE VANTAGE POINT. Yes, it stars Forest Whitaker. Don't be fooled by this. This is a terrible movie that wasn't even capable of amusing a teenager. We did have fun on the way home laughing about 1. Dennis Quaid's inablility to act, 2. The number of times they say POTUS and 3. How cars during the chase sequences appeared to be damanged, undamaged and then damaged again. So, that is $21 and 2 hours of my life that I won't get back. Don't make the same poor choice. I voted for Be Kind Rewind, but I never win.....

On to the hard part. I need to make an apology, here it goes.

Dear Girl Scouts of America,

Fellow sisters, you know I love you. But why am I always the last to have your tasty cookies delivered to my house? I hope you can understand, Girl Scouts who stood in front of The Hills Market today, that I felt betrayed when I say you peddling your treats to strangers. Strangers. Non-former Girl Scouts I'm sure. Don't you remember how I chased you down several months ago? You came to my house and Mr. Big Momma ordered. But the foolish man forgot to order the Thin Mints. Once I realized you were a Girl Scout and not selling magazines or crack, you were long gone. I ran like the wind in order to catch you, so determined to get my Thin Mints. So, to Troop 934, I must apologize. You didn't deserve the nasty and unrepeatable words that left my lips when I say you today outside The Hills Market. I was only upset because I felt abandonded, shunned. I can only now offer you my sincerest apology because just a few short minutes ago you knocked upon my door and delivered to me the best box of cookies you can only get once a year. Thank you Girl Scout and Father of Girl Scout (who actually drove her to deliver her cookies). As I am nearly finished with the first sleeve (yes, I am a total pig), I thank you.

Happy Selling,

Clintonville Big Momma

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